Overcoming the odd behavioral traits
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
Shamsher Chowdhury
THE Bangladeshis and the Bengalis have a longstanding cultural heritage they can rightly be proud of. I have, however, observed certain aspects of which I find are impediments to our development as a modern nation economically, politically, socially or otherwise. In this write-up I have tried to portray those typical aspects. It is my impression that the Bangladeshis by and large pursue a vision that is not only narrow but also self-defeating. Incidentally when I talk of the peculiar aspects I am excluding our excellent heritage of language, literature, music, its approach to other cultures and a host of others. The problem with the present-day trends in our culture is that these are not only poor but are also devoid of any intrinsic value. At times I find them to be rather cheap and meaningless.
Being an unsolicited well wisher and that too in matters where it is absolutely not desirable, I have often been asked by my friends and acquaintances alike as to what I have so far done about the marriage of my children particularly one who is past 30 or so. Making other’s business your business has become a hallmark of the Bengali society in general in varying degrees.
Most Bangladeshis have no concept of privacy. I have been experiencing almost routinely particularly since I and my family started to live in an apartment complex. Your neighbours drop into your apartment at odd hours of day and night and that too without any prior information or a prior appointment.
Consider this that the children accompanying their parents visiting would go round inside out of all areas of your apartment taking liberties to the extent of even jumping and walking on the living room furniture.
Or, consider the case of someone dropping hints about having a powerful brother, a sister or a cousin in the army or in the civil service and that too totally unsolicited in order to let you know that he has the potential of being an influential member of the society..
Our colonial mentality has not taken leave of us as yet. So many times I have come across people in gatherings and receptions — where there has been considerable number of diplomats or recognised officials of international organisations — often consciously praising the latter there and their countries just to be in their “good books.” God alone knows why.
A section of our high-profiled civil society members including senior bureaucrats and businessmen often in parties where hard drinks are served, drink to their hearts’ content. During my tenure of service spread over 35 years or so with some international organisations, I had to escort some senior members of the government almost in a drunken condition to their waiting cars.
By and large we are an undisciplined bunch of people. You see it all the time on the streets where cars move in a haphazard way, at the airports, at the railway stations, at river ports, at educational institutions so on and so forth. I am excluding the rowdy scenes we regularly come across during meetings and rallies organized by political parties. The Bangladeshis seem to thrive on chaos and confusion.
You are on your way to visit a friend or keep a business appointment, you stop to ask someone about directions to the exact location, invariably nine out of ten times, he or she, after thorough scrutiny of the address bearing chit most confidently guide you to wrong address. I am yet to see people who are so pleased with their level of misinformation and ignorance.
Keeping a commitment is not the forte of most Bangladeshis. You arrive at your tailor’s or a furniture shop to take delivery of your orders as per the date and time indicated in the order chit, you would find — it is not ready for delivery. The worst of all, the shop owner advises you of his or her failure to keep to the commitment with a broad grin.
Crossing busy road intersections with a mobile phone glued to one’s years is a common sight.
The Bangladeshis in general are vulnerable to gossips and rumour-mongering. This is often the case even with the educated section of the population.
Epilogue: This short commentary is written with malice towards none and charity for all. This is not the complete picture of the community at large.
We, as a nation, also have the proud legacy of fighting a unique war of liberation that bears testimony to the multifaceted strength of our character the kind of which one seldom comes across. Yet it is sad that we suffer from some drawbacks in our nature that we often fail to recognize. It is my feeling that if there has to be a drastic change in our outlook towards the outside world, we must come out of this culture of indulging in small talk and pettiness.
Let this be our resolve for the coming New Year—“From here onwards we shall broaden the horizon of our outlook and shun the path of all forms of pettiness and coterie thinking”.
...........................................
The writer can be reached at e-mail: chowdhury.shamsher@yahoo.com
THE Bangladeshis and the Bengalis have a longstanding cultural heritage they can rightly be proud of. I have, however, observed certain aspects of which I find are impediments to our development as a modern nation economically, politically, socially or otherwise. In this write-up I have tried to portray those typical aspects. It is my impression that the Bangladeshis by and large pursue a vision that is not only narrow but also self-defeating. Incidentally when I talk of the peculiar aspects I am excluding our excellent heritage of language, literature, music, its approach to other cultures and a host of others. The problem with the present-day trends in our culture is that these are not only poor but are also devoid of any intrinsic value. At times I find them to be rather cheap and meaningless.
Being an unsolicited well wisher and that too in matters where it is absolutely not desirable, I have often been asked by my friends and acquaintances alike as to what I have so far done about the marriage of my children particularly one who is past 30 or so. Making other’s business your business has become a hallmark of the Bengali society in general in varying degrees.
Most Bangladeshis have no concept of privacy. I have been experiencing almost routinely particularly since I and my family started to live in an apartment complex. Your neighbours drop into your apartment at odd hours of day and night and that too without any prior information or a prior appointment.
Consider this that the children accompanying their parents visiting would go round inside out of all areas of your apartment taking liberties to the extent of even jumping and walking on the living room furniture.
Or, consider the case of someone dropping hints about having a powerful brother, a sister or a cousin in the army or in the civil service and that too totally unsolicited in order to let you know that he has the potential of being an influential member of the society..
Our colonial mentality has not taken leave of us as yet. So many times I have come across people in gatherings and receptions — where there has been considerable number of diplomats or recognised officials of international organisations — often consciously praising the latter there and their countries just to be in their “good books.” God alone knows why.
A section of our high-profiled civil society members including senior bureaucrats and businessmen often in parties where hard drinks are served, drink to their hearts’ content. During my tenure of service spread over 35 years or so with some international organisations, I had to escort some senior members of the government almost in a drunken condition to their waiting cars.
By and large we are an undisciplined bunch of people. You see it all the time on the streets where cars move in a haphazard way, at the airports, at the railway stations, at river ports, at educational institutions so on and so forth. I am excluding the rowdy scenes we regularly come across during meetings and rallies organized by political parties. The Bangladeshis seem to thrive on chaos and confusion.
You are on your way to visit a friend or keep a business appointment, you stop to ask someone about directions to the exact location, invariably nine out of ten times, he or she, after thorough scrutiny of the address bearing chit most confidently guide you to wrong address. I am yet to see people who are so pleased with their level of misinformation and ignorance.
Keeping a commitment is not the forte of most Bangladeshis. You arrive at your tailor’s or a furniture shop to take delivery of your orders as per the date and time indicated in the order chit, you would find — it is not ready for delivery. The worst of all, the shop owner advises you of his or her failure to keep to the commitment with a broad grin.
Crossing busy road intersections with a mobile phone glued to one’s years is a common sight.
The Bangladeshis in general are vulnerable to gossips and rumour-mongering. This is often the case even with the educated section of the population.
Epilogue: This short commentary is written with malice towards none and charity for all. This is not the complete picture of the community at large.
We, as a nation, also have the proud legacy of fighting a unique war of liberation that bears testimony to the multifaceted strength of our character the kind of which one seldom comes across. Yet it is sad that we suffer from some drawbacks in our nature that we often fail to recognize. It is my feeling that if there has to be a drastic change in our outlook towards the outside world, we must come out of this culture of indulging in small talk and pettiness.
Let this be our resolve for the coming New Year—“From here onwards we shall broaden the horizon of our outlook and shun the path of all forms of pettiness and coterie thinking”.
...........................................
The writer can be reached at e-mail: chowdhury.shamsher@yahoo.com