On the Mother's Day last Sunday, a mother was beaten to death by her own son. The reason, he suspected her to be the cause of his fourth wife's unannounced departure from home. Little introduction is needed to describe the devilish killer son. The report carried in a Bangla contemporary gave no details of the incident or of the family size that is if all four wives were living with him or it was the only remaining spouse.
Whatever may be the situation, it is unthinkable that a son can be violent enough to physically assault his mother and that too merely on suspicion that she might have prompted the wife to leave his home. It would be too simplistic to draw a conclusion that at the level of society of this mother and son, such incidents takes place often. Presumably, here is a son who revels in polygamy. There are many such notorious men who change wives like people change clothes and there are still others who like to maintain a mini harem of their own if only they can afford.
Those who change wives can do so because divorce or separation simply does not cost them anything. Even they feel no compunction for walking on children out of the marriage. In the capital's slums, such cases are reported quite so often. It is the young mothers who have to bear the brunt of such temporary marriages and their consequences. In villages though, there is a marriage-crazy sort who travels widely only to settle for a while in a village and try to woo a girl there. In most cases they are successful because they target girls who do not have much demand in the so-called marriage market. After solemnisation of marriage, they try to extract money from the father-in-laws' families on this or that pretext. At times the haggling over such monetary exchange turns ugly. Thus one day the man leaves the village forever.
To such perverts, the Mother's Day carries no significance nor the woman who has brought them to this world. Apparently their sex drive and low moral and social standing trigger their criminal instincts. Clearly, the ritualistic celebration of mother for a day won't help. Unless a son is able to appreciate the heavenly tie between him and his mother, he may develop the mentality of disrespecting his parent. Even in poor and illiterate society, mothers or for that matter parents are held in high esteem. Poverty or lack of higher education does not stand in the way of taking the best possible care of their parents.
It is the wife-versus-mother rivalry that at times poisons the family environment. Not that the newly married is always to blame. Even mothers can be too possessive of their sons to allow the couple space enough to integrate with the family. In other cases, wives are basically intolerant of their mother-in-laws. Human relations are so intricate and unpredictable that no social norm can be set for any relationship between life partners. But society has its own process of evolution to overcome frailties and fallibilities. Only men or women of exceptional talent and vision can pull societies out of various socio-religious mires. They are known as socio-political reformers.
The fact that a quiet revolution is now under way to bring an end to child marriage gives some hope. But then monsters like the son who does not hesitate to take the life of his mother still prowl in societies. To take care of them, there is a need for spreading education --not just so-called functional education but the type considered quality. Bangladesh society seems to have moved away from its axis because crimes like child murder apart from other types of killing has exposed its excessive and bizarre violent tendency. This is a dangerous social trend.
If society loses its poise like this and gives in to needless aggression and intolerance, the sign is clear of decadence. A social campaign is needed to check the rot.
Where message of Mother\'s Day is yet to reach
Nilratan Halder | Published: May 14, 2016 00:00:00 | Updated: February 01, 2018 00:00:00
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