As a parent, one wears many hats: supporter, advocate, cheerleader, and advisor. Regardless of their child's age, they fret and hope they're steering them right. Every action, tear, heartache, obstacle, and ailment their child faces, they feel it tenfold.
Whether your child is as tiny as a button or as tall as a tree, it's easy to see them as little kids far from facing the big wide world. But time zooms like a rocket sometimes, and fast forward some years, and they become their own people. Before one can even blink, they'll be off to college, globe-trotting, and starting their adult journey.
However fast it may seem, growing up isn't just a sudden switch to reality; it's a marathon. You're not just prepping for the day they fly the coop; you're prepping them, too. Every parent has their parenting style, some more traditional than others. But everyone's just trying to arm their children with the right tools for adulting.
Now, what is adulting really? More precisely, what is the parameter to be a successful adult? The majority would say, being successful career-wise, skilled, and well-connected - an able working adult with money in the pocket and a name of their own - what else! But it is time to pay a closer view to the basics of sustaining as an adult.
Adulting is the act or practice of attending to the ordinary tasks required of a responsible adult. It is an essentiality one must embrace and practice to behave in a way that fits into the characteristics of an individual, especially the accomplishment of mundane but necessary tasks.
Here are some ways of guiding today's young generation towards a self-sufficient life and helping one cultivate independence, resilience, and adaptability in their kids.
Fostering independence from an early age
To be self-sufficient and trust one's choices, taking ownership and responsibility for one's decisions is important. So, parents should encourage decision-making: give their children opportunities to make choices and decisions from a young age, gradually increasing autonomy as they grow.
It is important to teach them life skills, like involving kids in household tasks and teaching them essential life skills such as cooking, cleaning, and other household chores. It is important to skill both sons and daughters in basic kitchen knowledge, cooking, cutting, doing dishes, cleaning after, taking out the trash, kitchen organisation, pantry management, etc. These experiences help them to be self-sufficient and organised adults, knocking their way around managing a house when they are on their own.
Another closely related aspect is to teach them efficient problem-solving. Parents should allow their children to face and think about challenges and encourage them to find solutions independently, providing guidance when necessary. For young kids, one may promote problem-solving by asking the child how they could fix a broken toy or resolve a disagreement with a sibling.
Building flexibility and adaptability
Flexibility and adaptability are very important life skills that are crucial today. They may leave their home for studies or move out permanently to their own house, but the main challenge can be adapting to their new environment.
The mentality to accept and adapt to changes starts with the parents or primary caregivers. Children or young adults notice very intricately how the adults respond to change and difficulties and what they do to adapt to the changes. So, demonstrating flexibility and adaptability in your own life is a great lesson for the young ones to learn from. It may start as simple as rearranging a weekend outing due to bad weather or reacting to a sudden change in weather.
It is also necessary to equip children with coping mechanisms for stress and adversity, such as mindfulness techniques or creative outlets. Dealing with failures or setbacks can set a great tone by sharing stories of your own setbacks and discussing what you learned from them.
Parents can teach the kids that failure is a natural part of learning and growth, encouraging them to bounce back from setbacks, from getting poor marks to getting rejected from a job. They will be able to see those experiences as a part of life, not their whole life.
Money management
Parents can ease many of the future complexities of kids becoming adults by instilling financial savvy and responsibility. They can teach budgeting skills by providing their child with a weekly allowance and guiding them to divide their funds for various purposes such as saving, spending, and charitable giving. Also, parents can introduce earning opportunities by assisting their child in launching a small business, such as selling homemade crafts or whatnot.
It is wise to start involving young adults in basic bank procedures, like how to open an account, create and manage savings accounts, understand taxes and finances, save for a rainy day, etc.
Furthermore, parents can model responsible spending habits by engaging in open discussions about purchases with their children. When they will grow up, they will reflect on those discussions to make their own financial choices. It can start as easy as taking the child, whether a boy or a girl, to Kachabazar, grocery shopping, the bank, shopping from local markets, etc. The earlier they experience the real world and its shenanigans, the faster they can make smart and informed financial choices.
Relationships
Parents and primary caregivers can create a dynamic environment where active listening and open communication thrive, ensuring that every child, irrespective of gender, feels heard and valued when expressing their thoughts and emotions. It may start as easy as a warm conversation on a family dinner table.
Let's imagine a family dinner where parents actively converse with each child, son and daughter, encouraging them to share their daily experiences. By listening attentively and validating their feelings, parents create a safe space for open communication; the sweetness of trust and compassion leaves a softness in their tender hearts that shall reflect as compassionate and empathetic adults.
In another scenario, parents might teach conflict resolution and empathy skills by involving children in resolving silly fights between siblings or friends. For instance, if siblings argue over sharing toys, parents can help them start a discussion where each child expresses their perspective and feelings. Through this process, children learn to empathise with others' viewpoints and learn about compromises. This skill will help them understand and logically accommodate others at every stage of their adult life.
Adulthood is scary; the challenges are inevitable, tiring, and continuous. But with a little help from the loved ones, life sure feels a lot liveable, if not easier.
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